Cold.

I'm freezing.

It's frigging-a cold.

Now, before all of you non-Californians start bellyaching about, "oh, that San Diego wimp, he doesn't understand what cold is," you should know a few things.

First, my apartment is old. Very old. Let's say it was built during an era in which they manufactured major apartment appliances to work until, oh, say, 2002. Including the heater. Put that together with a San Diego cold snap (low 50s), and you've got yourself one cold yours truly.

My apartment has no heat, so it's exactly the same degree of coldness inside and out. I could be outside and be no colder. Inside and no warmer. Inside has the advantage of having an oven into which I could put my head, but so far it hasn't come to this.

I can see my breath. Inside.

Brrrrrr.